Monday, April 5, 2010

The Collapse of Western Civ 101

Grover, for those of you not in the know is more than a muppet.  A Grover is also a student or alum of Grove City College in Grove City PA.  I'm a Grover, and as a Grover, I must ask that someone please pass the soapbox, because I most certainly must get up on one.

What made Grove City great, and the reason I went there, was that it dared to be different.  The school is unapologetically Christian.  Men and women students lived separately.  Booze was prohibited on campus.  Violation of either the alcoholic consumption or male-female fraternization policies was grounds for serious disciplinary action, up to and including dismissal.  The day before graduation, several members of my class got booted for cheating.  And horror of horrors, you not only had to take a class on the Bible, but you had to go to Chapel and listen to people talk about Jesus!  

I think that whole paragraph would fall into the category of hate crimes at most colleges.

But alas, not even Grove City is safe from the foul stench of "modernization".  

First to go, were Saturday morning classes, we wouldn't want to tax the poor students too much.  (as an aside, 8am Saturday classes were probably one of the best enforcement mechanisms against drinking)

Then I got a call from a perky student making fundraising calls for the college.  She informed me of the incredible wonders of the new on campus-off campus co-ed apartment housing.  She further informed me that she'd like some of my money.  I declined.

Then I heard that they held Graduation on the quad.  It's hard to explain this to a non-Grover, but I'll try. You can't (or at least couldn't it seems) go on the quad.  You walked on the sidewalks or faced tortures worse than being locked in a utility closet with Jack Bauer and a craftsman tool set.  Perhaps, a truly daring student would take a quick sprint across a small corner of the quad the week before graduation in an effort to stick it to the man and then quickly look around to make sure no one actually saw him.  Needless to say, the news that graduation was held on the quad came as a shock.  




From wikipedia:

Lying in the center of Grove City College Campus is the quadrangle, or "quad." Students have historically been prohibited by the administration from walking on the grass in this area. In recent years, restrictions have laxed, and the quad has been the subject of controversy among students and faculty. In the fall of 2005, the student government association voted to open the Upper Quad to "light athletic activities" and the administration established new policies for quad use. The Lower Quad remained off-limits - only used for such events as baccalaureate, commencement, and homecoming - until the fall of 2009, when it was also opened for use. Prior to the opening of the Quad, there was a long-standing legend on campus regarding the "Tower Sniper." Passed by word of mouth from upperclassmen to freshmen, the legend held that the Tower Sniper lived in the clock tower of Rockwell Hall and would shoot at anyone who walked across the quad.

LIGHT ATHLETIC ACTIVITIES!?!?!?  What exactly does that mean?  Well I know what that means. Frisbee....ON THE QUAD!

Even more disturbing than the actual walking on the grass, is how this revolution took place- the Student Government voted on it.   THE SGA.  As a Grover, I can faithfully attest that the SGA is completely unable at doing anything other than passing out cookies and holding meetings, and it struggles with those.  A college is not a democracy, and at least when I went there Grove City College would have told you as much.  What next, the SGA votes A's for everyone's report card?  People join SGA for one of three reasons:

1. They're politically conniving weasels who think it will look great on their resume.
2. They're glory hounds who have become addicted to validation of their popularity through student government elections since their landslide victory as Mrs. Tubbs home room representative in 5th grade.
3.  They like handing out cookies.

Not exactly the group of people who should be setting policy for a major institution of higher learning, don't you think?  The inmates are running the asylum and the administration is a bunch of cowards for hiding behind "the will of the people".

It's a sad day for Grovers everywhere.  At least for the Grovers who went there back when it was a real bastion of conservative Christian thought.  When men were men, and they didn't live with girls, sleep in on Saturdays, or walk on the grass.

Here's your soap box back.

1 comment:

Mike Tomashewski said...

I tell Kristy this all the time. I really think the trustees did a GREAT disservice to GCC by hiring Jewell as president.

I can see why they did it. They wanted to bankroll all the building projects, and he can bring in $$$ by bringing back the Greeks.

But I hope that once this season passes that they get rid of him post haste and get in someone who wants to bring it back to his rightful place.

GCC should be America's premiere conservative college but other places like Hillsdale have taken that crown.

Other thoughts...

Saturday classes... I can guess that those were hard to fill from a teacher standpoint as well (they want weekends off etc). I didn't mind them, and it doesn't bother me so much that they aren't around.

Co-ed Housing. My sister Katie lives in them. I need to quiz her how it is. In my mind the boys are in one wing and the girls are in another... but how stinking hard would it have been to have each building separate? Or to build them in separate places? This has Jewell fundraising stink all over it.

Quad Graduation. You know, if they gave us the opportunity to do this, I would have liked it. It is neat to be on the forbidden grass one time for something special. In my mind that would make staying off it that much more important, it honors your eventual graduation... but then your next point...

Quad Frisbee. So you can't play frisbee on the precious soccer fields (we're div 3, Lamie- get over yourself!) but you can on the QUAD now? JEWELL!!! This is ridiculous. Way to ruin distinctiveness. If my kids go there they will keep the old ways.